Prologue: Chad & Ronnie went to England & had an adventure. They went to return an invite to Sir Mumphrey directly, the invite was not for them. (All this & more can be read in A Chad & Ronnie Christahannaqwanza Spectacular, Part 1-3 & Epilogue.) Chad & Ronnie were in England & were going to go home, some how. Our story picks up somewhere around there.
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The Parrodipolis International Airport, Concourse A, Gate 1. A transatlantic flight just got in from Heathrow Airport in England. It's your average flight with average people, or so you would think.
Your typical people got off, they went to go get their luggage & then maybe meet family. After them came the flight crew get off. Then, getting off the plane were two men. One with brown hair & glasses. On his back, being worn like a back pack, is an accordion. He is also pulling a hand truck, on the hand truck is his friend. The man is strapped to the hand truck, he also has a straight jacket on. The man also has mask, of sorts, on to stop him from talking. This dynamic duo are known as Chadwick L. Swiss & Ronald Arnold Gerrimoto Beeslyhuxtoy. They are more commonly known as Chad & Ronnie.
Chad & Ronnie had a couple of small problems at the Heathrow Airport. First, they only wanted one way tickets to the US & they didn't have any luggage (besides Chad's Accordion). They were taken aside by Airport Security, later they checked out to be "ok" for the flight. They got their tickets. Then, Ronnie was accosting a few people, Ronnie called it "expanding their minds", while waiting for the flight to leave. He was taking away by Security. They tried to calm him down, that didn't work. They tried to drug him, he just got more uncontrollable. With the help of Chad's accordion music, he calmed down. He was then bound & gagged.
Back at the Parrodipolis International Airport, Chad helped Ronnie through the crowds, they got a few looks form passer's by (But, that's normal for them). They got out to the main terminal & Chad started looking for their ride. Yes, Jane decided to final come pick them up. Chad saw her, she was sitting on one of the many benches. She was reading that morning's Daily Trombone.
She heard a squeaky wheel, it was getting louder. She didn't look up from the paper. It keep getting louder & louder & louder. Then, it stopped. Jane didn't move. A few minutes wen by, then she looked up to see Chad smiling down at her & from what she could see, Ronnie might have also been smiling.
"Hello, boys. How was the trip?" She asked.
Ronnie started to mumble something. Chad just smiled & gave a thumbs up.
"You know, Chad. You can speak to me, I think I have known you long enough to at least have that privilege. I know you can talk, you do it to Ronnie all the time."
Chad just smiled & shook his head yes. Ronnie mumbled something.
"Do you guys have any luggage we need to get?"
Chad shook his head no & then patted his accordion.
"Ok. I'm guessing that means that you only have the accordion as your luggage."
Chad smiled again & shook his head yes.
"So, what do we do with Ronnie?" Jane said referencing Ronnie in his Silence of the Lambs gear.
Chad then starts doing a stabbing motion with his arm, the arm motion was directed at Ronnie. Then, Chad saw a look of desperation on Jane's face. Chad stopped, laughed a bit, then pointed at a nice looking, bald headed, security guard standing a few feet from them.
"Mam'am." the Guard said.
"Yes?" Jane said. She didn't really like being called mam'am, but she wasn't going to argue with an armed Guard.
"As soon as Mr. Beeslyhuxtoy leaves the terminal, I'll take back the restraints."
"ok."
"Then, he'll been under your care from there."
"oh, great." Jane said. The Guard wasn't sure if she was trying to be funny or was serious.
The Group (Chad, Ronnie, Jane & the Guard) walk over to the exit doors. They step outside, release Ronnie & the Guard takes the restraints back inside the airport.
"Hello, Jane." Ronnie said, pulling out the wedgie he'd had since England.
"Hi, Ronnie."
"Where's the car?" Ronnie said, looking around for it.
"Over there." Jane said, pointing to the concrete parking structure.
"Then, Let's go!" Ronnie said.
The Group (now minus the Guard) start walking towards the parking structure. Ronnie is in front of the group, then Jane & bringing up the rear is Chad & his accordion makes sounds as he move. Ronnie is running everywhere, darting in between, in front & behind cars. He hums the Mission Impossible theme.
Jane slows down so she can talk with Chad.
"So, how's it going?" she asks. Chad shrugs his shoulders.
"Did you like jolly ol' England?" Jane said with a small laugh.
Chad gave a small smile & shrugged his shoulders, again.
"How was the food?" She asks & get the same reaction.
She asks a few other questions & gets the same response, a smile & a shrug of the shoulders.
Then, Jane a little mad almost screams at Chad. "Can't I get to say anything?"
Chad gave another small smile & shrugged his shoulders, yet again. Then, walked a little faster & wondered off. Jane let out a sigh. She promises to herself that one day she will have a verbal conversation with Chad.
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Twenty minutes later, Jane finds Ronnie, he was talking to some people about Broccoli & it's cosmic importance. She then went to find Chad (She drug Ronnie behind her). Jane found Chad waiting next to Jane's Car. She didn't tell him where the car was or what car she drove but shrugged off the that fact. All three get in the car (Jane in the driver's seat, Ronnie in the passenger seat & Chad in the back with his accordion.)
"So, where to now?" Jane asked as she turned on the car. The tape she was listening to came on. It's was Dr. Phil & he was talking about how to deal with ex-boyfriends. Jane quickly went to turn it off. She gave out an embarrassed laugh. She heard Chad laugh. Ronnie didn't do anything.
"Well, I would like to go see Little Cat." Ronnie said, then turned to Chad. "How about you?" Chad shrugged his shoulders. "So, it's settled & were off!"
Jane put the car into drive, drove out of the parking structure. She paid her fair & drove back to her apartment to get Ronnie's hamster.
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They got to Jane's Dullard's Corners apartment building. They got out & Jane stopped Chad & Ronnie before going up the stairs to the building.
"Now, Chad & Ronnie. I want you two to wait here. I'll go get Little Cat. Ok?"
"Ok, whatever you want? Why don't you want me in your apartment? I've been in it before." Ronnie said, a little quickly.
"I know. That's why I want you to wait out here." Jane said. She turned & walked up the stairs. Then, into the building. Before she closed the door, she looked back. Ronnie waved, Chad smiled. Then, she closed the door & had a bad feeling.
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No more then twenty minutes later did Jane come back with Little Cat, she saw that Ronnie was gone. Chad was still there, he was leaning against Jane's car playing a song on his accordion.
"Where did he go?" She asked.
Chad pointed to the left & continued to play, it sound like the Blues to Jane. Jane looked left & saw the path of destruction Ronnie has left.
"Why didn't you go after him?"
Chad shrugged his shoulders.
"Ok. You stay here with Little Cat. I'll go find Ronnie. Ok?"
Chad smiled & Jane guessed that was a yes. Jane handed Chad the hamster. He waved to the hamster, Little Cat waved back.
As Jane went to go look for Ronnie, Chad played his accordion as Little Cat danced a small jig on the top of Jane's Car.
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Jane found Ronnie a few blocks away from where she left him.
"Ronnie, what are you doing here?" Jane asked.
"Expanding this young lady's mind!" Ronnie said. Ronnie was talking an elderly woman. All three of them were at a Bus Stop. The woman looked scared.
"I'm sorry, Mrs. Johnson." Jane apologized to her neighbor.
"It's ok, Jane. At least, he stopped wanting to dance with me." she said.
"Ronnie!" Jane said.
"Yes?"
"Why did you wonder off?"
"I did what you said, I waited. But, you were gone for, like, four hours. I got bored, so I left."
"I was only gone for twenty minutes."
"oh. I told Chad to tell you where I went, did he tell you?"
"No. Chad never talks to anyone."
"He talks to me. Does that mean I'm not anyone?"
"No. You know what I mean."
"I do?" Ronnie questioned. He arched on eyebrow.
"Stop that. That was one reason I broke up with you, it's almost impossible to have a conversation with you."
"It is?" Again Ronnie questioned. He arched the other eyebrow now.
"Now come back to the car, Chad & Little Cat are waiting."
"Ok." Ronnie said. As they walked away, he turned back & waved to Mrs. Johnson. "It was nice meeting you. Remember what I said, Grover Cleveland was only US President to be an Extra Terrestrial, too & Aliens are trying to take over Cleveland. There might be a connection!"
Jane shook her head & sighed. Mrs. Johnson waved as they left.
"Such a nice man. A little odd, but a nice man." she said to herself. Then, when back to her crochet, she was making mittens.
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Ronnie & Jane made it back to the car, Chad & Little Cat were gone.
"Now where did they go ?" She said.
"The Government might have gotten them. They have been after us since the mid-80's. We have done a pretty good job avoiding them. But, leaving them out in the open, all alone & being able to be seen by anyone maybe wasn't the smartest thing."
Jane rolled her eyes. Then, say that Chad was sitting across the street at a bus stop. Ronnie & Jane walk across the street.
"There you are." Jane said.
"I knew he was here." Ronnie said a little full of himself.
"No, you didn't. You thought the Government had gotten him."
"They might have & then returned him." Ronnie said. "Did they?" he asked Chad. Chad shook his head no.
"oh. So, Jane are you ready to take me & Chad back to our place of residence?" Ronnie asked Jane.
"No."
"What?"
"The bus should get you close."
"oh. Then, until we meet again please remember the immortal words of some dude: A radish is not a radish until it is planted."
Jane rolled her eyes, then walked back across the street & then back into her building. That's not exactly what Dr. Phil told her to do, but it was close.
THE END!
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FOOTNOTES ABOUT JANE:
At the end of Part 3 of the Chad & Ronnie Christahannaqwanza Spectacular, Ronnie made a phone call to Jane if she would come pick them up from England. She declined. But, I guess she said she agreed to pick them up from the Airport, stateside.
Jane is Ronnie's Ex-Girlfriend, but has recently started spending a whole lot more time with him again. She took care of his hamster while he was away (This might be the first recorded instance that Ronnie went without Little Cat). Her relation with Chad is undefined at the moment.
Jane lives in Dullard's Corner & is a Secretary in Parrodipolis. Her last name is Tarzania.
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